This Week In Musings

July 8, 1999

"And then I tried to beat up my shoe!"

Quite frankly, I think that would make a great slogan, bumper sticker, or T-shirt. And I would personally like to lead the trend for "gay" being a synonym for "kickass" as opposed to it's current state of being a synonym for "lame". Perhaps someday, we can even push it towards becoming a euphimism for "homosexual" as in:

A: It was totally gay, the only beer they had left was a bottle of Red Dog that was left in the sun all day.

A: It was totally Gay! We drwa chalk paintings on the driveway and played pin-the-taill-on-the-donkey until 4am!

"I feel equally bad for all of the fudge-packers in chocolate factories around the world, and the dashing butt-pirates who sail the seven seas as freebooters in search of galleons loaded with rare and expensive cigars. Why must their noble titles be misappropriated?" The Fat Man

"I vote we all try extra-hard to post musings that will amuse Leo from now on. After all, this board is meant to praise Leo and take joy in Him forever!" The Fat Man

"Flans got his food and sat down, but for some reason he sat at the place where you get your condiments. I was sitting at the other condiments place, looking over at him. As he was eating, he started singing to his food. It was something from John Henry (I can't remember what), but he replaced a word with "fry juice" (i.e. ketchup). A friend of mine miraculously appeared, and we decided to go over by Flans. We were too shy to talk to him, so we each went to a ketchup dispenser on either side of him and got some ketchup. Flans then started singing a song about ketchup getting squirted by his head to the tune of Edith Head. We giggled and sat back down. Then, behind the counter, my friend's mom threw a cup of water on her husband." Girkabob's dream

"Today, I walked down below the street, and this dog brought up to me, and wondered me for quackers. The dog climbed me and required quackers, but I did not have any, therefore I said "leaves me alone dog! I do not have quackers". But The dog very persistent he was. it said, "Give to me quackers fucking!!!" I tried to save me, but the dog hit me on the head with a pipe, and took my wallet. and now I does not have any money." The Mean Geoff

"we burn this huge 80 foot tall stack of round wooden pallets (somebody tell freud to come meet our firemen) and then everyone cheers as it falls over and the firemen run around squirting each other and small children. oh and we put a old outhouse on top with a dummy inside it. heres to america lets burn some antique shit!" Michelle LeBlanc

"From the title, I was expecting an investigative-journalism-type discourse on the meat industy's heinous coverup of "chicken" sausage made with ground up little kiddies and I'm afraid of sausage as it is, but throw children into the mix-Eeeeew! I hate children!" skittle

"Oh hey! TV Guide says it's time to watch Jake and the..Whoops! Dropped the TV Guide! Well I'll just read this World War 2 documentary on the atomic bomb. Apparently it was nicknamed the..Hey! The power went out! This really sucks. You know, this recliner is really small. It's a good thing I'm not a..OW! Someone threw a brick at me! Well you know, the opposite of a thin woman is a..YOWCH! What is the deal with these bricks?" Chris Lough. I don't get it, but I love it.

"well, due to excessive heat michelle decided to stay inside today and so she lay like a banana slug on the floor well actually more like a red popcicle on hot pavement cause i melted and stuck there and luckily the tv was on to entertain me. voila, enter vh1 picture show "friends til the end" (suspense music here) and so i watched it and that girl (who i refer to in my subject errr whats her name( anyone know?( really i should know this shes famous....)(i usually know these things)shes on one of the many wb tv shows) please tell me i want to sleep tonight) what IS it!) that girl...you know the one!) she played this chick who was in a band and grew up doing fasion shows and being beautiful and well loved and perfect, then this other blond girl comes along and tries to steal her life (the blond girl, i don't know who she was played by either but she killed some people and some junk, you know, subplots) she became her best friend, joined her band sorority etc, stole her boyfriend and her other friends, then the band turns against her except this (in case you're getting tired of reading, this does have a point) one guy nick who obviously was "meant to be with her" the whole movie and they're all sad "how will we ever get back at them?"said brown haired nameless main character girl "we could compeate against them in the battle of the bands." birght idea courtesy nick aka guy she was secretly going to fall for and we all knew it. "but two people, thats not a band!" said...wait i got it! shannon dorety!(i think) then nick replies "don't tell that to they might be giants!" Michelle LeBlanc. I love the ending! You finally remember!

"I got one too! But mine came a few days ago. And it said something about her being in love with me and if she couldn't have me, she'd have to kill herself. It was kind of an unusual thing to write on vacation." Mike Remiker. ... "I'm sorry Mike, but postcards take a notoriosly long amount of time to reach who they're addressed to. It is highly possible that in the time between when she sent the card and when you received it, she may have killed herself." YardGnome