This Week In Musings

April 22, 1999

When I read that 29 percent were opposed to McCarthy, I almost cried

"I Hate TWIM! It's the biggest dumb idea ever! It's the most stupidest bunch of french fries in the daggone thingamabob! Phooey!" Brandon Deadmonkey

"Then you will come visit me in OREGON baby, and I will feed you the finest chocolates bought in the finest chocolate store in all of France...then I will cook you and your parents a delicious MEAL of steak, rolls, and the finest corn from the most fertile fields in all of Iowa...then I will freak you doggy-style till the break of dawn." The Fat Man posing as Faelan

"You get to see all the funny stuff you've missed, and if you already saw it before, you can feel special and think to yourself, "Wow! I was there when that happened!". Shed a single tear for Vinyl Boy...He needs it." The Nice Geoff. Oh man, do I ever!

"Originally, I was going to title this message "Sure You Can!" and type a pi symbol, but you're right -- you CAN'T type that symbol, at least not in these here message windows." Rabid.Child.

"The shooting star was obviously a message from God that you and I belong together. Wasn't it romantic walking around on the grounds that night in the starlight? You looked so beautiful. I think it's a clear sign of our starcrossed love. I saw Shana eat two beef jerkys in my car on the Taconic State Parkway." Rob Plass

"i was at a campfire with a bunch of my semi-friends and they were all singing simon and garfunkle and i was thinking "tmbg, please some tmbg" (actually i was thinking "oh my god my pants are on fire!!!) but the tmbg part was there too)" Michelle LeBlanc

"I can feel safe knowing that most of the people that post are generally decent people, while the other half are completely insane. Ad I mean the "we have to leave or he'll kill us in our sleep" insane, not the "oh look at that insane but funny person" kinda insane. And what's the deal with that Wagster fella? Is his name Doug, Andrew, Wagster, 2000, 3000, or what? I just can't tell with this kid. Some kids just straddle the line here. Just straddle the line. And you gotta watch them because their so devious and moody like that. One day you give your daughter away to him, the next he calls you, yelling that he's figured out cold fusion and that man can finally go into space and leave him alone now. I tell ya, I wouldn't trust most kids these days with my trash, you never know when you'll find them playing in it in the middle of the street. And usually during the late hours too. Damn kids! Go to bed! We all have to work tomorrow to get the money to keep your pimply asses knee-high in quality trash. I swear if I had a nickel for everytime I said that..." Chris Low! Go go go!

"HELLO HELLO DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE STAY OUT OF MY ASS YOU REALLY ARE STARTING TO STINK" Bambi DarkStar

"I wish I had my mommy here to kiss my owies, 'cause I have a habit of running into walls. Why, I'll never forget the time at the last MST3K convention, I walked into a dark showing of... The one with the Paperchase guy... and Megaweapon (and the deceased Persus Cambada) and I ran right into the wall, swearing. Everybody laughed at me. I merely pointed and said "There's a wall there." Sushi Splendiferous

"Didst thou climb the holy mount and, yea, have parley with the LEO? The LEO is mighty and holds the Board in His hands as though 'twer but a bauble. All who muse and tread the Board live in fear of His ire, and twice in days of yore He looked upon the Board and saw that it was smutty and, yea, verily He purged it and told the sons of musers 'Thou shalt post by the sweat of your passwords, for this behavior will not be allowed to continue. So say I the LEO and thou shalt obey, for I am mighty and full of wroth.' Didst thou, Vinyl Boy son of Vinyl Man, ascend Mount Org and look upon the face of the LEO? Did He email to thee as a pillar of flame in the night? And didst thou sign in letters writ in flame a contract with the LEO that now thou'st the temerity to shun and say: 'I fear not the LEO though he be muckle and mighty, and His contracts are as chaff in the wind to me'? Woe betide thee! There is no happiness save in humble obedience to the LEO the Great Measurer and Judge of the Wicked! Heed His words! Post not smut! Praise to LEO! As at terminal, so at server, Board without end... " The Fat Man. Yes.

"Bella bella! Mucho bella! Life is beautiful! Ahh! Ha ha! The sad children make me feel like sitting in some bathtub with slimy, uhhh, ketchup in it! And now we must drink! Drink to the remembrance of all the children! We drink for the children! We do a shot for every kid! Yes! Make me feel happy like tall mountain with happy birds and eagles singing beautiful songs all about America! Snow with-a the palm trees like some Fellini movie! I will do everything in my power to be exactly like him! For he is like serpent running through the tall grass and I am the lonely sloth-a! My stomach explodes to you with life! Oh, the happiness!" Roberto Benigni

""I've watched [Mike] over Seinfeld," says 15-year-old Amber Erceg, "because I just find his show more entertaining. I like Jason's show, too, because it makes me laugh, but that saddens me because I don't think it's supposed to be funny." While Jason says Cable TV fame makes it easier for him to talk to girls, Mike claims to be dateless."